How do you look forward to the holidays after divorce. Handling the issues that can stem from divorce and children is hard enough, but surviving the holidays with a split family can be a major challenge. The holiday season is supposed to be a happy time, however, and following these tips can make divorce and holidays a whole lot easier for everyone who is involved.
The holiday season isn’t the time to get into a major custody battle with your ex. Schedules might clash or change, but it’s best to be as flexible as possible to make dealing with divorce and children easier during the winter months. It’s also important not to be greedy or to try to hog your children for every holiday and event; they will want to see your ex, so it’s important to be cooperative.
Allow Your Children to Participate in Old Traditions
If your children are accustomed to participating in certain holiday traditions, such as enjoying a Christmas Eve meal with your ex and their family, it is important to allow them to go this year. These traditions mean a lot to children. Why upset your children by not allowing them to attend the events that they have attended for years.
Create Exciting New Traditions
Since the holidays will obviously be different this year, it is important to make these changes as exciting and fun as possible for your children. Consider creating fun new holiday traditions that your children will enjoy, such as enjoying a favorite movie or meal. Then, your child will have something to look forward to and might not look at all of these changes quite so negatively.
Avoid Introducing New Relationships
Although there is certainly nothing wrong with moving on and meeting a new significant other, the holiday season isn’t a good time to introduce him or her to your children. Especially if they have not met that special him or her yet. Be sensitive and create a positive environment that will help your children enjoy the holidays.
Don’t Make Your Children Feel Guilty
If your child is going to be spending time with your ex around the holidays, it can be tempting to tell him or her just how lonely you will be or how much you wish he or she could stay with you. This will make your little one feel guilty, however, and you surely don’t want your child to feel anything but happy during this time of year. Even if you will be lonely and missing your kids on Christmas, it is important to talk to someone else about it; don’t mention it to them. Instead, remain positive and tell them that you hope that they have a good time with their mother or father.
Stay in Communication
It’s important to stay in communication with your ex and your kids during the season. Talk to your ex about gift ideas and holiday plans so that you will be on the same page, and make sure to stay in contact with your children when they are with the other parent.
If you have hard feelings towards your ex, it’s important not to let this resentment show to your children. Divorce and children are already hard enough during the holidays, and bickering with your ex will cause stress for everyone who is involved, including your kids. Try to be nice during the holiday season; not only will you be happier for it, but your little ones and ex will be too.
Surviving divorce and children during the holidays isn’t easy for anyone, but it becomes even more difficult when you throw animosity into the mix. Hopefully, following these tips can help make surviving the holidays a whole lot easier and more pleasant.